


I am become death

by Naraht



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Alternate Universe - 1940s, Atomic Horror, For Science?, Gen, M/M, Past Night Vale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-29
Updated: 2013-07-29
Packaged: 2017-12-21 17:03:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/902728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Naraht/pseuds/Naraht
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is a new sun shining over the desert. Though most of us were pretty fond of the old one. </p><p>Welcome to Night Vale, an atomic community.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I am become death

There is a new sun shining over the desert. Though most of us were pretty fond of the old one. 

Welcome to Night Vale, an atomic community.

***

Listeners, we've had some exciting news today from the Mayor and the City Council. The faceless figures you've seen all over town for the past few months taking pictures of your property and gently suggesting that you should vacate your homes for your own protection were none other than government agents.

Yes, Steve Carlsberg, no need to send in another letter! I already know what you're going say, namely, "I told you so." You may have been right about that one, but you didn't have any inkling what was really going on.

A new age of scientific discovery is about to dawn, mushroom-shaped, over Night Vale.

(I hear Desert Bluffs wasn't even on the shortlist.)

Suddenly the mysterious presence of the inhumanly beautiful Carlos and his team of scientists is explained. They didn't want to keep secrets from us all of these long months, or to leave unnecessarily and frustratingly cryptic notes for us at the radio station. If they played it coy, it was only through fear of the electric chair.

Night Vale is about to enter the atomic age.

***

If you should hear the warning sirens go off, watch out for small, earnest, eerily obedient children. You may see them crouched under desks or tables with their hands covering their heads. No one knows why the children are there or what they want, but they seem to find the ritual comforting.

***

The Sheriff's Secret Police are asking listeners to be on the lookout for a man who is believed to have escaped from the scientific facility out in the desert. I say "believed" because he has been observed entering the facility two hundred thirty-seven times and has not yet been seen leaving. Either he's been escaping on the sly or there are two hundred thirty-seven copies of him in there. And which do you think is more likely?

...No, you've got me, I don't know either.

Anyway, the Sheriff's Secret Police think a secret dimensional portal may be involved and warn you not to approach him or to concentrate too deeply on any logic problems that he may pose to you. The man you're watching for is tall, sardonic, and not nearly as handsome as Carlos, even though both of them are scientists. He is fond of playing the bongos and may be found loitering in the vicinity of strip clubs.

He says it helps him to think. Isn't that what they all say.

***

We've just heard that Carlos has recently published his 1001st scientific paper. Congratulations, Carlos. 

When I say "we," I really mean "I." It's one of those radio things. Actually Carlos stopped by the station this afternoon to tell me the news personally. 

Listeners, do you think that this is a good sign? You can call in, write, send me a telegram, or just mutter to yourself about how this country can build an atom bomb in three years flat but we can't even allow suspected homosexuals to serve in the military. That's what I usually do.

(The Sheriff's Secret Police have asked me to remind a certain Sergeant at the facility that calling your boyfriend "Georgie" in your letters home isn't fooling anyone. And that's a good reminder for all of us, listeners! They're always listening in. Especially to those of us on the radio.)

***

According to reliable sources, our new scientific neighbors have no plans to discharge any nuclear byproducts into the river. In fact there is no river. It was vaporized about three weeks ago during perfectly routine testing, which explains why the fishing has been so bad recently. There is nothing to worry about.

***

All citizens are reminded that tonight is the night to gather 'round the bloodstone and spend an hour or two chanting for a good cause, namely American victory over the forces of Evil. At least I think it's a good cause. When Carlos stopped by the station this afternoon he said he thought the event would be a little like a Nuremberg rally. But, with all deference to his immaculately sculpted haircut and commanding scientific accomplishments, since when has a little chanting done anybody any harm? Apart from that one time with all the tentacles. 

_Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn._

Excuse me. That's tonight at seven pm. If you're not able to make it, Desert Bluffs is holding their own bloodstone rally on Thursday at six, but I wouldn't recommend it. I hear that their bloodstone has fallen under Communist influence and an exorcism is planned for the following week. Good luck, Desert Bluffs!

***

Carlos has come to the studio again. He is weeping and quoting from the _Bhagavad Gita_.

Although I long for nothing more than to draw him into my arms and offer him comfort, my status as a staunch and patriotic heterosexual makes that impossible. Carlos, my dear, I hope you can forgive me.

***

In case you were wondering, there is indeed a radioactive dust cloud passing over Night Vale. Unlike the glow cloud of several weeks ago, there will be no mysterious urges towards worship, only a gentle fall of tiny radioactive particles that most listeners will probably hardly notice.

If winds turn towards the west, however, Old Town Night Vale can expect a few inches of radioactive fallout by morning. I hear it's a lot like snow, except it's less cold and sticks around for longer. Enjoy the sledding and, parents, remember to tell your children that eating the fallout might be disappointing. Like much of life, it leaves a nasty aftertaste.

***

On that final note, we have news from Old Woman Josie: the angels have gone.

Goodnight, listeners. Good night, ladies, good night.

**Author's Note:**

> Apologies to Richard Feynman, J. Robert Oppenheimer, T. S. Eliot (who knew a thing or two about transformative works), and a friend of mine who does indeed have his name on 1001 published scientific papers.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[Podfic] I am become death](https://archiveofourown.org/works/958636) by [einzwitterion](https://archiveofourown.org/users/einzwitterion/pseuds/einzwitterion)




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